Integrity & Diplomacy
The general turnover in leadership we’re experiencing lately has some obvious downsides, including the loss of historic knowledge, added time and effort required to onboard, and the skill development of newer leaders as they advance positions. Another common thread I’ve been hearing recently from those who stayed, is that the turnover impacts trusted relationships. Leaders have built necessary alliances for navigating complexity, both within and across organizations, so when your co-pilot exits it can feel like you’re back at square one. Will you get along as well with someone new coming in? It will take time and deliberate relationship building, two necessities sometimes at odds with one another.
Alliances tend to be built on the shared values as a cornerstone to the relationship. They get it. We’re always on the same page. It’s like we’re the same person. These are all examples I’ve heard of leaders expressing their disappointment in losing someone they’ve leaned on. Within those conversations was also the central theme of their integrity being matched in the other.
The honest frustration they express is the visceral reflection of integrity up against a core value; I feel very lucky to work with such principled people. However, that integrity can also be inflexible and keep them from finding compromise. When you have a co-leader that sees it the same way it empowers you to stay true to that integrity, but it doesn’t always serve leaders well in the long run. One question I’ve asked some leaders to reflect on lately is this: how does your integrity not serve you?
The question elicits looking inwards as well as out. It necessitates understanding more deeply what the core value is that holds a leader to their position, and what they are so against. Taken a step further it helps in building understanding of another’s perspective, creating a bridge to commonality. This is diplomacy, which leads to finding alignment and the compromise needed to achieve shared goals.
When frustrated by the turnover and void left from an alliance, I remind leaders to begin with compromise. The partnership is likely a necessity in organizational structures and usually not a perfect pairing, however these duos always require collaboration. Time is increasingly finite in the drive to achieve goals and an alignment of shared values is infrequent. Approaching the new relationship as a negotiation of equals finding common ground will help create a partner committed to navigating alongside you, even if they never become your buddy. However, they may surprise you.